Birthday Shenanigans

Last week's birthday was super fun. I got up in the morning, had some coffee in bed courtesy of Alison, opened some presents, and slowly got up. Then we went down to the Good Food Emporium for brunch with Kristina & Ron, Angie & Cliff, Meg & KC & Evan, and Johanna. Mimi and Mike showed up a bit later too, but there was no room for them at our already very cramped table, and Mike wasn't feeling well anyway, so it was regrets only from them. Mimi did take some photos of us through the aquarium, though. They ended up not much weirder than the others we took that day — I think our camera's been going a bit bonkers since the day Alison flew over the handlebars while trying to take my picture from her bike.






Brunch was excellent as always, and our favourite waitress didn't even bat an eye at the ridiculous number of people around the table. Afterwards, completely wired on coffee, six of us went for some afternoon bowling at the Bayers Road Shopping Centre (More then [sic] just a game...). Scores varied widely. Everyone felt they didn't live up to their bowling potential. For some reason, Alison and I kept ending up tied. The jokey old guy behind the counter was the same one we'd had last time, and he pulled the same jokes. He also cut us a deal like last time.






After bowling, Johanna came back to our place for some birthday carrot cake, which Alison had thoughtfully decorated à la Cake Wrecks.



So far, this year's promising to be a pretty great one.

Happy Birthday, Andrew!

Something for All Tastes (that Are Identical to Mine)

Nothing very newsworthy has been happening around here. Our car had some trouble in Wolfville but we changed the oil and got the spark plugs replaced and now it's OK. Boring. The Lodge show at the Frigate was really fun but I don't have any audio or visual record of it, so why even tell you? Yawn.

Instead, I think I'll just share a bunch of cool stuff I've been appreciating lately. Because there's lots of it. Is it just me, or does our culture seem to be coming up with some pretty fascinating ways of distracting us these days? I almost expect to be amazed and disoriented by any new record or book or movie I check out, and feel kind of disappointed if I come out of the experience merely amused. Maybe my brain's just getting old and easily astounded. Anyway, here's a whole lot of things that have recently freaked my beak, starting with

Music:

I just got a bunch of CDs I'd ordered in the mail from Aquarius Records in San Francisco, and a couple of them are absolutely blowing my mind. One is this compilation of global psychedelic funk tunes from 1968 to 1975, called Psych Funk 101. Everything on it is weird and obscure and just plain great, but I especially like this piece from Italian group Il Gruppo (The Group) called "The Feed-back." Sounds almost like it could be from some weird sixties science fiction show like The Prisoner. Has anyone seen the new version of that show yet? I tried to watch the first episode, but it was incredibly boring and the guy was no Patrick McGoohan (R.I.P.) and I had to turn it off. Maybe it gets good, though. Anyone know?


I also received the new Flaming Lips album, Embryonic. It's weird! In a nothing-but-good way. But they've been getting so songy lately, I think a lot of people were afraid they'd forgotten their weirdo roots. This record should lay that rumour to rest. I suppose this track is actually one of the songier ones. I'm pretty sure it was inspired by The Boredoms' Super AE, but I can't fault them because I just want to listen to it over and over. It's called "Silver Trembling Hands." In case you weren't sure whether they're purposely trying to be psychedelic, the chorus goes, "When she's high."


Here's something that my friend Charles turned me onto. It's a post-punk British band from the eighties (is that redundant?), two of whose members were two of the non-Billy-Idol members of Generation X. The band's called Empire and the album is Expensive Sound. You can download the whole thing here if you like it. Alison and I are pretty into it. It reminds me of Comsat Angels or The Sound, but with maybe a little more Public Image thrown in there. This is the title track. Beautiful ugly guitar!


OK, this one also came in the Aquarius order. Good batch this time around! I guess that's what happens when you hold off on buying records for awhile. True Widow are a trio from Texas — Austin, I think — and I don't really know anything more about them. The artwork on their self-titled CD is horrible (ugly band logo that looks like a tattoo and all-caps script everywhere; it's impossible to read), but the music is completely up my alley. Heavy and chromatic and sludgy, but also melodic and catchy and pretty. Check out "Mesh Mask," which purely coincidentally sounds very similar to a song of mine that I have yet to record. Honest.


Movies/TV:

The newest Woody Allen movie, starring Larry David of Curb Your Enthusiasm, is pretty darn funny, I'm happy to report. Pret-tayyyy... pret-tayyyyyy... pret-ty funny. And it's not just because LD's such a hilarious misanthrope either; the writing is actually some vintage Woody Allen. I didn't have high hopes for it, given his recent and even not-so-recent track record. I guess Match Point was good, but before that I think the last thing of his I really enjoyed was Husbands and Wives, which is now oh my god seventeen years old. (OK, Celebrity wasn't bad either, even though the whole thing felt like a suicide note.) And don't get me wrong, this one's no Husband's and Wives. But it's definitely worthwhile.

In Treatment: I can't recommend this HBO series enough. We've only got three episodes left to watch of the second season, and I don't know what we're going to do when it's all gone. Each episode is a very flawed therapist's (Gabriel Byrne) session with one of his patients. Over five episodes you see four different patients, and then the fifth is a visit to his own therapist (Dianne Wiest). That represents one week in his life. Then it starts over again with the first patient in the sixth episode, and so you gradually get to know the characters and see them get to know themselves and grow psychologically, usually despite themselves. Everyone's a mess. The whole thing is nothing but talking heads and character study and it's absolutely riveting.

And speaking of riveting TV, how about that Mad Men finale episode? Did you see it? Everything sure got resolved nicely — a little TOO nicely. I'm worried now that there might not be another season. And the Beatles haven't even arrived in America yet. I know this because I'm compiling the music for a Christmas party that James, the photographer Alison occasionally assists, is having, and it's a Mad-Men-themed party, which means I've been having to do all sorts of research to figure out what exactly I'm going to put on for four hours or so. I have some pretty good ideas, though. Anyway, sure do love this show, was my point. Can't get enough.

Now, this one's not technically a recommendation, since I haven't actually seen this movie yet. It didn't make it to Halifax, so I guess I'll have to wait until it comes out on DVD. But I really, really WANT to see it. It's called Brief Interviews with Hideous Men, and is based on David Foster Wallace's collection of darker-than-dark short stories by the same name. The movie was directed by that guy from The Office. The American one. Do we still have to add that, or can it now be assumed? I've read some very mixed reviews, which makes complete sense knowing the source material. The stories are probably not everyone's cup of tea. They're very funny and very tragic, usually at the same time and for the same reasons. The best one concerns a woman getting raped by a serial killer. I guess I only bring this movie up because I'm assuming it's going to be at least very interesting, and I'm wondering whether anyone out there has seen it.

Websites:

Erika, you'll really appreciate this one. Actually, this blog devoted to cake-decorating-gone-wrong may have been made specifically for you, although almost anyone should enjoy it, I would think. Alison and I have been laughing our heads off over it, thanks to a tip off from our friend Mike. I suggest, as he did, looking at the "Classics" first (tab in the right-hand column). I really never imagined there were so many hilarious cakes out there.

Here's another site recommended by Mike. It's a collection of family photos submitted by their owners because they're hilarious in one way or another. One of these was actually made into the poster for The Lodge's most recent show, which is how I found out about the site. Some of the posts are definitely better than others, and there are too few on a page because of all the ads, but there's plenty of yuk-worthy material on there. Enough schadenfreude for the most voracious Candid Camera fan.

Has everyone already seen the "shreds" series of videos on YouTube? It's worth checking out if you haven't and you have a few spare minutes and you aren't drinking any liquids that you wouldn't want to spray out of your nose when you start laughing uncontrollably. This guy takes video footage of various rock guys rocking out and replaces the sound with his own, which somehow syncs up exactly with what they are doing, but makes them look like jackasses. The first one I ever saw, and still the funniest to me, was Eddie Van Halen Shreds. But there's also Eric Clapton, Santana, KISS, and, most recently, the Rolling Stones. Hey! Whazzup, make up?

And finally, for the less humourously inclined, here's a collection of old Dutch children's picture books (the books are old; NOT the children — come on!) that I was led to by Peacay at Bibliodyssey — still the richest and most fascinating blog on the internet, for my money. Click on any of the 655 tiny book covers and you'll get a much larger version of it. You can zoom in REALLY big on the cover, or look at ANY of the inside pages not quite as big. Lots of great rock show poster material! I was going to talk about books on here too — as in the kind you hold in your hand and read and sometimes there aren't even any pictures to look at — but this is already taking way too long, and you should have plenty there to get you started if you've been sitting around twiddling your thumbs, and who even read books anymore, anyway? Enjoy.

End o' the Week

Happy Friday, everyone. Got another Lodge show tonight — this one a super early one. Hopefully it'll go better than our last show, which was a bit of a nightmare of lacklustre energy combined with technical problems.

Then Alison and I are off to Wolfville in the morning for an overnight stay at the Blomidon Inn, celebrating our FIFTEENTH anniversary! Holy crap. Hallowe'en was actually the day, but we haven't been able to get away until now. We're both looking forward to some quality, computerless time together.

Which reminds me... gotta go download and watch last night's episode of Project Runway now. Have a nice weekend, all. Byeee!

Sherman Hines Update

Forgot to mention that a few days ago I got a copy of a letter sent to Sherman Hines from the Nova Scotia Labour Standards Division, requesting he contact them regarding my complaint, viz. that he owes me ca. three hundred bucks. The next day I heard from the woman who had sent the letter. She told me that Sherman called her and very angrily told her that he has no intention of paying me a cent. He didn't deny that I had worked the hours claimed, but said that the work I did was insubstantial. She told him that whether that is true or not he's still required by law to pay me, and explained the process that this would now go through. There's some kind of tribunal where he can appeal the Division's judgment, which he told her fine he will do and she told him that's his right although he doesn't have a leg to stand on, and then eventually, after like four to six months, they'll be able to take the money directly from his bank account if it comes to that. He said that he will refrain from paying me for as long as he legally can.

I don't really care how long I have to wait for the money, as it's just going to be a nice windfall whenever it does appear, at this point. I'm glad to learn, however, that I won't have to go to court or incur any costs to get it, something I was concerned about.

So I was quite uplifted by this phone call, and finding the whole affair rather amusing, when the best part of all came. The woman told me that Sherman had requested copies of the documentation I had sent with my complaint, a request which is within the employer's rights in these cases, though not usually exercised. So she mailed him a copy. I imagine he's probably received it by now. There are details in there about my reasons for leaving the job that I thought pertinent to my case, but that I didn't think necessary or appropriate to tell Sherman at the time that I quit — details such as the poor quality of his design aesthetics, the creepiness of his two rococo "trophy" (i.e. dead animal parts) rooms, and the frightening extent of his controlling and paranoid character. Oh well. I guess that latter is not exactly going to be remedied by this series of events, but as long as I'm getting paid, I'm a happy man.

666

I have a spot between my eyebrows that gets a crease in it, and I don't seem to be able to do anything about it. Actually, it's more of a dent than a crease. And red. And when I say it "gets a crease" it would now be more accurate to just say it has a crease, because over the past year or so it has become a permanent feature of my facial expression. I know that it means I'm subtly knitting my eyebrows together, but I can't seem to figure out how to properly relax my face so that it goes away.

Meditating used to do it, and it was the only thing that would do it. In fact, the dent used to be a sure sign that it was time for me to meditate, because I had unconsciously become unconscious, letting my mind push me around while believing that the reverse relationship held. I came to think of the dent as the mark of the beast — my false self taking me over and fooling me into thinking it was my true self. I also thought of it sometimes as my third eye closing because I was no longer in tune with the present moment and my infinite connections to the rest of the universe. Not that I really believe in the third eye, which is supposed to be the centre of clairvoyant perception, but the symbolism always seemed kind of interesting.

So it's a little upsetting to see it there all the time. I try to accept it, since I know you can't fight resistance by resisting it. And meditating does still help somewhat. But the thing is, it's actually kind of painful. I'm going around pretty much all the time now with a mild stress headache. I've been looking on the internet, trying to figure out what can be done about this condition, but all I find is vanity-based stuff about preventing wrinkles and looking younger. I honestly don't care about that, although it does worry me that I might appear perpetually angry to others. What's that quote about every man eventually getting the face he deserves? I think that's supposed to be by the age of fifty. I don't know if I believe that anyway — seems a little mean. What about disfigured people? Or Gary Coleman?

Anyway, does anyone have any suggestions or personal knowledge about what can be done? Right now it's burning and pounding. I feel like a sense of humour is probably an important ingredient in the remedy, so I keep repeating my favourite Groucho Marx joke in my head, like a mantra: Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. No luck, but at least I'm having fun imagining what the life cycle of a time fly might look like, and how museum guards might keep them away from the arrowhead collections.

Seamus Self-Promotion

Another Lodge show tonight. Come one, come all! This one featuring full sensory apparatus.

Here's a video I made for the song we were playing in the video in the last post, using footage from that very video plus some creepy educational films by Jean Painlevé about octopi. If you like it, I recommend his Science Is Fiction Criterion Collection DVDs.

Hali Happowe'en

The Lodge played an early show last night (Hallowe'en) at Tribeca. It was a really tough one because we couldn't see or hear each other or our own instruments, but I think we pulled it off OK. Plenty of people came out in full costume, there were three other great bands including Dub Sabbath who blew everyone's minds with their reggae druid metal and smoke machine, and the whole thing was just a lot of fun. Alison put together a great "Scary Tyler Moore" outfit — no one knew who she was.







Afterward, we wandered around downtown some, and I was happy to see that there were loads of adults in really imaginative costumes, all having a good time and being very friendly. None of this doctor and semi-pornographic nurse stuff you usually see. Wish we had some photos of the Smurf, Rainbow Brite, head in a box, and Animal from the Muppets to show you, and especially of the hilarious "hot cops" from the burrito place at the end of the night. Great timez. Now I can't wait to see the photos from my sister's infamous annual party.