Weather/Sports/Comics

There's still not much going on here, besides working way too much on really frustrating, uninspiring stuff. Otherwise, it's summer, which means lots of seeing people outdoors to drink, gossip, and generally hang out. It's very hot and humid in Halifax this year, which is supposed to be unusual but seems to be the norm more and more. I think we're getting more pollution blown up from the States than we used to.

Ali and I just got back in from playing some night tennis with a couple we know who happened to be there too. We played last weekend too, for about three hours in the blazing sun, and just about died the next day. I had a softball game to pitch and my back was killing me. Weirdly, the game ended early because the other team didn't technically have enough players and should have forfeited, but we said we'd play them anyway, and then when there was a dispute about a call in the fifth inning which began to turn a little ugly they decided to forfeit after all because they didn't feel like playing anymore. I can't decide if that was a smart move or poor sportsmanship. They were winning. It sure made my team mad. That was the second of two games, though, and we won the first handily. I even got a homerun, sore back and all.

Here's a gross but funny story: Ali and I were eating veggie hot dogs and french fries on the waterfront for lunch the other day, and saw a little girl drop her baseball hat into the harbour water by a little footbridge. She started crying and her family came over and all looked down into the water with her. Then some more people started gathering around and looking down too. They were pretty much all tourists. We went back to eating for awhile, and then suddenly realized that the crowd was cheering, still looking down into the water. We went over to see what they were looking at, and there was the little girl's father, minus his shirt, swimming out into the bilge to grab the hat and swim back. It was definitely one of the more disgusting things I've ever seen. He came out smiling and one of the local tourism information girls politely informed him that he might consider a quick trip to the hospital, as the harbour water is probably the most toxic substance known to mankind, not least because there is a steady stream of raw sewage being dumped into it. He asked whether there wasn't somewhere he could hose down, and the girl whisked him over to a side area to do just that, followed closely by his concerned looking family, the mother clenching her jaw and tightly gripping... the little girl's baseball hat! We were convinced she must still not understand completely what had happened, so Ali went over to quietly advise her that the offending garment might now be better off in some sort of sealed waste depot. But she kind of impatiently insisted that they would definitely be keeping it, as it was the girl's best hat. To be fully clear, this was a nylon, mesh-backed fuchsia hat with a plastic size adjustment strap and an ostensibly cute message silk-screened onto the front. The kind you can buy at any dollar store, usually on sale. "Not anymore," seemed the only possible response.

And if you thought those hijinx were funny, check out this sidesplitter entitled "Having a Bad Day". Meg sent it to me at work. I can't believe what an insensitive jerk this woman's son is.





- Andrew

When I say Buddha, you say machine! Buddha! ... Buddha!

Hey. Not much to say, but I didn't want anyone thinking I was dead over here, accidentally crushed under the laughable weight of my own 80's and 90's pre-recorded cassettes collection, with no one to find my flat magnetized corpse but Buster. I've been kind of living it up here while Alison endures barely-heard-of relatives in ultrahip Saskatchewan. You know: going out every night to play pool or tennis, watching movies, cooking fancy food, and playing the guitar for days at a stretch. Generally not fixing the place up. I did move some cushions from one room to another this evening before heading out to yoga class. Poor Ali will be home tomorrow night at 10:32. Whether she'll be better off I leave for you to decide, but I'll be happy to see her.

I'm working on designing some phony money, à la Canadian Tire, at work, and it's making me realize how much fun it would be to design real currency. All those nice engravings and Spirograph-like lines made out of tiny "Bank of Canada"s and stuff. I wonder who gets to do that?

Has anyone else heard about this crazy Mars viewing we're supposedly going to have in August? I hear it's going to grow bigger and bigger every night for awhile, until it's the size of a full moon! Can this really be possible? Where's the Star Hustler when you really need him? I'm freaking out! I am freaking oouut!

And finally, I remembered to go to the post office on my lunch today to get a money order and send away for the buddha machine. I can't wait 'til it gets here — it'll be just like when I got those two-way space phones from Bazooka Joe comics. Only good.

- Andrew

Blessed with Too Much to Do

Lately I've been feeling like I'm slowly getting more and more behind on the various things that are waiting for me to do them, and it's been kind of weighing on me. I'm trying to just do one thing at a time, and not think about the other things, but the "to do" pile seems to grow faster than I can shrink it. (In case you're wondering, writing a blog post is NOT one of the things on the list.)

But today was a really beautiful day and I got a lot accomplished at work and we just got back from a really great yoga class, so now I feel pretty hopeful about things. Alison is right now packing for her trip to Saskatchewan via Toronto tomorrow morning. She'll be gone for a week, which is a big bummer, but my plan is to get all sorts of crap done without the annoying distraction of a cute friend with whom I always want to do fun things.

Today, for instance, I rode home for lunch so we could eat it in the backyard. Sure, it was a nice meal of salted string beans and various Mediterranean salads under a bright warm sun, with a gentle breeze and birds singing in the trees; and granted, there was a New York Times crossword puzzle thrown in to sweeten the pot; but... uh, actually I forget where I was going with this... something about the toilet not cleaning itself.

Also since the last post, our friend and my coworker, Meg, got back from her two week vacation in Japan and brought us all sorts of nice exotic gifts. Right now I'm eating some Pocky that is "Men's" flavour, which means that it's dark chocolate instead of the regular kind. Kooky. It sure is good to have Meg back at work and in our lives. I can't help but feel we would have won at least one of our softball games last weekend if she'd been there. There is only one Meg®.

Finally, I got to have a nice visit with my old friend Al the other night. He's been living out of town for quite some time, and has gone through some pretty hard times, the details of which I'm mostly in the dark about, but he's going to be moving back to Halifax in September. I'm looking forward to having him around and catching up with his crazy life. Also, meeting his by all accounts adorable little daughter.

And now to bed so I can get up insanely early with my cute distraction.

- Andrew

Jack's Favourite Radio Station

Alison went to the beach with Krista and Keith today and they stopped at a second-hand store, where she found this great pair of headphones that are a radio for like twenty-five cents. Perfect for rollerskating. We tried them out and the station we picked up best was a brand new one that never existed before. Z103 (with the 'z' pronounced the American way, I guess so it rhymes) — The Beat! It's all dance/hip-hop music so we probably won't be listening to it very much, but we had a good time dancing around with those headphones on and saying, "This is the beat, man!"


If you click back and forth between these two photos on the camera it makes a pretty cool animation.

Dig the Elaine Benice thumbs-up.


I swear I didn't know I was making this face. A scary thought.

Otherwise, this weekend was up and down as I had to spend about five hours at work yesterday putting together a proposal for some new business which I know we definitely won't be getting, but then sat out in the sun in our backyard this afternoon and wrote a whole new song for the first time in I don't know how long. Plus there was some very fun softball and I actually finished that horrible sudoku.

- Andrew

Our Distinguished Guests II

Well, the weather was beautiful, as promised. And I didn't receive a strange business invitation, so that puts the score at Meteorologists 27, Astrologists 32. However, right now the Economists are kicking both of their butts with their "gas prices will continue to rise" strategy. It's gonna be an exciting Pseudoscience Olympics! Clam Harbour Beach was exactly as I remembered it and we had a really nice day picnicking on the bluff and then beaching on the beach. I'll let these pictures show you what I mean.




I still haven't finished that sudoku, by the way. But I did get in the water, unlike those other namby-pamby sand-lyers.

That night we ate at the Five Fisherman, an outrageously overpriced seafood restaurant. The food was good and everything, but the service was none too fancy. We again had a really nice time, though. Ate way too much, too. There was a photo taken but it looks like crap so y'all ain't seein' it.

Next day we attended the final performance of the Royal Nova Scotia International Tattoo. It was an odd collection of stiffly stirring military musical numbers


and weird acrobatics,


with a few syrupy songs belted out in between and some terribly corny "comedy" routines thrown in for good measure. At three and a half hours, it definitely could have stood some cuts. But the acts we had gone expecting to see, i.e. the marching bands, were all very good. My and Ali's favourites were the pipe bands. Here's just a taste of the caco-eupho(n/r)ic drone.




There was supposed to be a softball game on Sunday, and I was hoping Mom and Papa would be able to come and marvel at my underhanded underhand wonderlob, but it rained all day so the field was too wet. Instead, we located their old house and then took a trip out to the always nostalgic Chickenburger, home of the world-famous sandwich that my uncle calls "chicken microwaved until it explodes and then thrown on a wet bun". Ali took two pictures of which, believe it or not, this is the better. I call it Fun Times at the Chickenburger.


Boy, we did a lot of eating with those guys. That night, their last here, was at an Irish pub called The Old Triangle. Once again, you'll have to take my word for it that the other shot was even worse.


There was an old-timey Irish-esque young couple called Bette and Wallet playing, who were excellent. Both multi-instrumentalists. I guess they know Al Tuck, because at one point we suddenly realized they were playing "Family Photo," which he co-wrote with Matthew Grimson in our old apartment on Robie Street years ago. So that was a nice small-world-that-is-Halifax moment for the visitors.

It was really nice having those two around. Saying goodbye was kind of hard. It's too bad my Dad couldn't come down with them. Maybe next time. Now we're back to the usual grind of work and apartment arranging, and figuring out what kind of summer vacation we can set up next.

- Andrew

P.S. I just found out that Syd Barrett, founding member of The Pink Floyd and thinly veiled subject of most of their material after they kicked him out of the band, died today. If I didn't have to go to bed this very minute I would play you Baby Lemonade. Maybe you could track it down yourself. I think he was a fairly tortured soul, so let's hope he's found some peace now.

Happy Birthday, Jeff!!

Our Distinguished Guests

My mom and grandfather arrived yesterday and we've been having a good time seeing the sights, eating the food, and chewing the fat. Yesterday we had some really late lunch at an Irish pub and then hung out at our new place for awhile with some G&Ts.


Today was down to the Halifax waterfront, where we we checked out the HMCS Sackville, of which Papa (my grandfather) is a trustee, and headed into the Maritime Museum of the Atlantic.


Neither Ali nor I had ever been to that museum before, so it was fun to finally see what goes on in there. However, it soon became apparent that they should rename it the Maritime Museum of Atlantic Death. You won't find anything about cute sea creatures, marine ecology, or the fishing life in there. It's pretty much all bloody naval battles, shipwrecks, and disasters. The 1:300 scale models of navy ships, hand crafted by a group of unpaid old guys who work there almost every day (!) were very impressive, but the guns and swords and shoes of juvenile Titanic victims started making Ali and me feel a little queasy. Then, when we got to the large section covering the Halifax Explosion, a couple of exhibits was all we could take before we both broke into tears and had to get out of there. Making Ali cry is like shooting fish in a barrel, but in my own defense, let me just say that the second exhibit was all about the telegraph operator who heroically saved a trainload of people from coming into Halifax minutes before the explosion (you've probably seen the Canadian Heritage Moment on TV) and they had transcribed his morse code message in large bold letters on a vertical board: "Munitions ships on fire. Halt train. Goodbye, boys." While Mom and Papa watched the film about the explosion, we decided the Sable Island exhibit would be a good distraction, what with its interestingly isolated, tiny population and those beautiful horses. But of course when we got to it we saw that the title was "Sable Island — Graveyard of the Atlantic" and it was all about the many shipwrecks that have happened there. It was pretty funny, I had to admit.

Included in the ticket price was admission onto an old scientific research ship called the Acadia. That was pretty cool, as I'd often admired that ship when walking down by the water. It's straight out of a Tintin comic. While we were exploring her lower deck the Citadel cannon went off (at 12:36, for some strange reason?), surprising all of us.


Then there was a delicious seafood lunch at McKelvie's (actually, Papa had a chicken sandwich),


after which Mom, Ali, and I walked down to Pier 21 to see the giant cruise ship, The Queen Mary II, which had recently docked there.


I guess Ali must have taken all the pics, as she's not in any of them. While in the area, we picked up supplies at the nearby grocery store for the picnic which we'll have tomorrow at Clam Harbour Beach. 0% chance of rain, supposedly, but I'm still keeping my fingers crossed.

- Andrew

That weekend was so nice, I think I'll have another.

Happy belated Canada Day, fellow Canucks and Canadiophiles. Hope everyone had a nice long weekend. Us? Yeah, not bad at all, thanks for asking. There'd been some plans to go camping but we didn't get organized fast enough so they fell through. Instead, though, we got to go to the beach with our friend Krista, where we ran into her boss and his partner and their dog, Lola, the last of whom is really sweet and cute.





The weather was perfect, although the water was still a little too cold to get in unless you were an obliviously roly-poly toddler. But today we got to do some swimming in the pool of the sister of our other friend Keith.

We also spent a lot of time fixing up our new place — figuring out where things look best, lugging them around, finding out there aren't enough plug sockets there and so figuring out where they look second best... that kind of thing. It's starting to be a pretty sweet little abode, but we won't be satisfied until it is such a dream apartment that we never want to leave. Even if there is no food or toilet paper. Today I alphebetized all the cassettes and created my own Dewey decimal system for the non-fiction books. Yesterday was CDs, stereo, and television. We somehow have free cable in this place, which watch for that to be our eventual downfall. Is Friends ALWAYS on? I never realized. I'm sure when the police finally break down the door it will be either that, Seinfeld, or Everybody Loves Raymond entertaining the flies that are feeding on our comfortably seated bodies. Just please don't let it be Oprah.

Our other other friend Jill came by yesterday to check the place out and bring us some nice housewarming tea and candles. She was full of compliments on our painting job, and she's a professional painter, so we were glowing a little bit. We had some coffee in the backyard while she showed us how to "dead-head" a few flowers. It was pretty nice.

Oh yeah, and after the beach on Saturday our even other friend Sherry had the first event in her and our still other friend Jay's brand new store. It was an art opening and pretty much every hipster in town was there, all looking fabulous. The artist had rented a stretch limo and it went around picking up and dropping off po-mo bohos all night long, which never stopped amusing me as they crawled incongruously out of the back seat. Sherry's family were there too, so I got to meet them for the first time — what a bunch of sweethearts. Sherry herself looked incredible in some clothes she'd made herself, which is a large part of what they're going to be selling at the store. The store looked fantastic too. It's called "Lost & Found" and has a really nice round sign which will soon be made into a clock. That in itself will be great, because for some reason there are almost no public clocks in Halifax. Besides Sherry's creations, they'll be selling second hand clothes, records, objets d'art, and indescribable thingamajigs. I can't wait for the opening on the 7th.

But before that, my mom and grandfather are coming for a visit, on Wednesday. I'm taking Wednesday to Friday off work to pal around with them and show them the sights, including the Tattoo about which I'm actually kind of excited as I've never seen it. But which means I only work tomorrow this week. Which, together with the fact that Meg has gone to Japan for two weeks, means the rest of the creative department may be totally screwed. And which also means that I had to go into work for four hours today to get some work done that has to go out first thing tomorrow because I won't be around to look at the proofs from the printer otherwise. Which meant that I missed antiquing and beaching with Alison and Krista today. But that's OK because I got it all done with no distractions and now I'm ready for an extra-long weekend with Mom & Papa. Hwee! Hwat fun!

- Andrew